It's just not what I had planned. I mean, I thought that my life was going to be this perfect little world I could arrange and build for myself, then, yes, then I started to realize I had no power or control over anything. I always seemed to be reacting instead of acting. I was easy going, accepting, okay with the curve balls life was pitching me. I mean, afterall, at least I was still taking the pitches and was still holding a bat!
Then, I began to notice that I wasn't batting in a ball game at all. I was in the cross fire of a fierce game of dodge ball. Both sides were trying to take me out! I all of sudden know what it's like to be standing all alone, and as you are keeping your eye on those you calculated as being your biggest threat, those "Goliaths" surrounding you... You realize, it's the little sneaky buggers that are the most dangerous and challenging.
Until... You realize that you have love. You have care. That you are in somebody's prayers and all those little somebodies are entirely the reason how it is possible to keep taking the hits. That even though you never really know much at all... You do feel "heart strength" and "peace" from those you love.